[Digital image]. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://quotesgram.com/shes-not-me-quotes/

I’ve been thinking a lot about fear lately. I’ve been feeling anxious about the upcoming BCFP seminar and experiencing moments of doubt: What if I freeze? What if I’m not prepared? What if I fail? This level of fear hasn’t diminished me completely because I know I have the power within me to be bold. When we are fearful, our creativity is suppressed and our capacity for innovation is diminished. Instead of choosing fear, I will make a conscious choice to be bold. This means taking risks and not being afraid. I realize that developing the BCFP Capstone Seminar along with my work on ImagineCreateServe has been a tremendousundertaking, but it has also been a creative adventure. Palmer (1997) writes, “Fear is everywhere-in our culture, in our institutions, in ourselves-and it cuts us off from everything” (p. 56). I can choose to lead this seminar with curiosity, hope, and empathy. This means stepping out in bold ways that may seem out of the box for many. Servant-leadership challenges people to be brave and courageous, and to bring ideas like friendship and perhaps even love to the work place.

When I started my Master’s Degree I was at a turning point in my career. As I mentioned in my proposal, it was in 2014 that I recognized my passion for leadership development. At the time, I was serving on a temporary HR assignment on the same team I now work for.  I loved the work I was doing and felt a great sense of purpose in developing others. Following my time in the temporary assignment, I was required to report back to my old Finance organization. I was extremely unhappy and fearful during this time. I felt no sense of purpose in my work, which was a stark contrast to the assignment I had come from. Furthermore, I was stuck in the middle of toxic leadership and organizational dysfunction. Fortunately the HR team I had worked for opened up a full-time opportunity a few weeks later. I applied, interviewed, and was determined that I would be selected to fill the role. Several weeks later, I was humbled to find out I wasn’t selected to fill the position. I interviewed for several other HR positions and was rejected time and time again. This experience of failure was humbling and made me a more resilient Servant leader. Today, I am proud to serve the young, bright and talented participants of the Business Career Foundation Program. My resilience needed to be tested through failures to get to where I am today. It was during this time that I decided to start Graduate School. This learning experience has been transformational in the way I view the world.

Personal growth happens when we “work through the mud.” It is through “working through the mud” that we are able to become more empathetic and resilient leaders. Failure is something I no longer fear because I recognize that failure has inspired my personal growth as a Servant leader. I built resilience the more I was rejected and eventually was able to welcome the failure I experienced as an opportunity to grow and develop into the Servant leader I am becoming. I feel liberated to have learned this lesson and to be able to pass on this wisdom to the people I serve. “Working through the mud” requires an act of boldness. Being bold sparks transformational change. Bold leaders are those who are willing to take risks and speak up. Bold leaders are comfortable with failure and choose hope over fear. As a Servant leader, I will choose to be bold and welcome failure as an opportunity to emerge as a more empathetic and resilient leader for the community I serve.

Food for Thought:

1. When in your life have you had to “work through the mud?” What did you learn?
2. What is your perception of failure and why?
3. In what ways can you be a “bold” with your leadership?